Grace under pressure. Not making things worse when you’re having one of those days.
September 20, 2016
Bono has a great line from a lesser known U2 song: “Some days have bouncers that won’t let you in.” Well, today was one of those days.
In big ways and small I was vexed by unmet expectations. A rejection here. A late coming change order there. Computer problems. Trouble at the bank. Scheduling issues. Just a myriad of stuff. The day would not let me in.
Undoubtedly you have had such days. God forbid worse. God forbid lasting longer. For these are the vicissitudes of life. Said another way, shit happens. And no one is immune.
Yet, I did not succumb to it. When one crummy thing led to another per Murphy’s Law I did not rage against him. I paused before each fallen hurdle. Took stock. Thought about the many blessings in my life. When I picked up my youngest from school I asked about her day, giving a smile and looking for one back. It was received. Despite feeling hurt, my attitude spared loved ones. I did not make things worse.
Later, in the car with my middle child, a daughter of 15, I told her that this was a difficult day for me – the truth. She asked for details and I explained some of it. She put her phone away and we had a meaningful conversation. She worried and wondered and asked good questions. By the time we got home, we were both laughing. I came to realize my bad day enabled a rare moment with my daughter, something precious.
Silver lining? A door shuts another opens? There are many proverbs about our challenges teaching us but when we are in them they are easy to forget. For me, anyway. The old me would have added to my difficulties by creating ten more. Maybe I would have lashed out to those that were vexing me and to those that were not, making everyone feel bad, effecting consequences.
But today I did not falter. I remembered to pause when agitated. Take stock. I even asked a confidant for help. These are things many of you do intuitively. For me it’s a daily reprieve, this grace under pressure.
Maybe these words will help one of you. Writing them down is another tool for helping me. Like saying thank you for this day and all of its blessings.
(Author’s note: above mentioned lyric from Some Days are Better than Others, off U2’s 1993 album, Zooropa )
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