Facebook Gump: “Life is like a box of friends”

June 15, 2008

Late to the Facebook sandbox, I stand by its side, wary of all the friendsters cavorting within. Do I want to go there at all? Do I want so many friends?

I’d aborted my foray into MySpace one week after joining. Too many fake babes falsely coming on to me. I’d accepted the first few gals as a novelty but, fearing reprisal from my wife or anyone else who happened upon the harem, I abandoned “MyBrothel” forever. Once in a while, I get an email from some Serena beckoning me like a siren.

Needless to say, I didn’t want to create another experience like that. Yet, the only way to become versed in social networks is to join one…or many. To avoid them altogether seems no different than avoiding texting, HDTV or any other social-technological advances. As I’ve said before, our business exists in front of trends (or wants to, anyway); to not go there is to not know the consumer. Suicide.

But Facebook feels more legit, less tawdry. So I dive in like a retard. The ad world is relatively small. What if I could “friend” all who are in it? I know this is insane (as well as undesirable) hence my use of the word retard.

I adored collecting things as a child: comics, stamps, rocks, bugs, etc. I’m also an addictive personality, which means I can become obsessive about any new drug. Facebook enables both these DNA strands to flourish like weeds.

I am not alone. Friends are guppies on Facebook. And guppies make more guppies. Judging by everyone’s collection of friends, everyone on Facebook is the most popular kid in class. And maybe that’s the biggest key to its massive popularity. Now any doofus can have a robust peer group. Including me!

Be my new best friend. Find me on Facebook.

FYI: Posting from Cannes on AdFreak!


2 Responses to “Facebook Gump: “Life is like a box of friends””

  1. David Burn said

    I deactived my Facebook account. It’s a terribly annoying site (with frightening connections to the intelligence community). Now that I know just how annoying it is, I know I don’t want to be a member. But, yes, it’s good to keep up and to learn these things first-hand instead of reading about it elsewhere, maybe on a blog.

    As for the MySpace hookers, they’ve been zapped. I get no spam inside of MySpace now.

    For me, MySpace has a much greater utility than Facebook. Namely, a direct connection to bands I love/like and the chance to discover new bands.

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